Soccer Relationships



“Football is an honest game. It’s true to life. It’s a game about sharing. Football is a team game. So is life.”

– Bill Shankly

Your fitness and health should be good, what about your relationships? The power of relationships are the food of life so you must be aware of the various relationship benefits and problems which can directly occur in your club.

There may be some individuals who are more concerned with themselves than the team, that spoils the closeness of the squad. It could be they have an iron-will and are determined to be the best, or get the best for their family if the club does not match their ambition. Some seniors may get bitter and jealous towards a skilful, young, new signing. Perhaps some members show a lack of commitment toward the overall team mission.

Accept there can be hard, challenging times ahead in your club. Its best to separate those from your personal life. Any negative feelings can rub off on those around you. Is it good to put loved ones through your disappointments? Best just to share the good times.

Some club’s team spirit has reached legendary status, being so great it could be worth ten points over a season. In some cases being a team player can overcome any poor technical skill in terms of what can be contributed to the overall team.

Are there people around who will support you? For a young player often its not the opposition that can be a barrier, but family, friends, work colleagues or team mates who are the problem. “You’ll never be good enough” or “don’t set your sights too high.” As well meaning as they think they are, people saying those comments make a player worse than better. If you take notice of people who tell you what you cannot do, you will never accomplish anything. Your placed in a negative frame of mind, have a conflict of priorities and it all spills over into poor sporting standards.

You get intolerant coaches who think they are being helpful by criticising you. Some players respond well to that, but not all. “You’ll never make it in soccer” does not work for everyone. Often you go onto the pitch and make mistakes because a negative expectation has been set up in your mind.

Less experienced players should be coached and encouraged by the more senior team members, they can work directly with juniors and lead by example. The junior players then have an opportunity to learn directly from their heroes, while the senior players learn more from coaching and working with enthusiastic juniors. A coach sometimes cannot give enough feedback to all the individuals in a squad, here, the senior players can see, advise, correct and encourage juniors.

Whether you are a professional or an amateur, if you want to live the life of an athlete you must dedicate yourself to situs judi online for nine months of the year. Yes, you can have a drink or two to wind down, but do it at appropriate times. Almost everyday, the sports pages print embarrassing and sometimes tragic stories of car crashes, drunken behaviour, drug suspensions, gambling. Lives and careers have been ruined by the poor choices sports people have made.

You cannot go clubbing. You will always get caught as there is always someone waiting with a camera. There is a vast amount of coverage today devoted to soccer players private lives. Some reporters will write anything for the sake of a news exclusive. There is a saying in tabloid journalism ‘don’t let the facts get in the way of a good story.’

Have you had an argument with someone, maybe the team captain and hours later you are still re-living it, still seeing the captains face and hearing the words. If you change the pictures and sounds you can change your feelings.

What about a conflict of ideas with a coach, official or team mate? Perhaps you should consider what they have said before dismissing it. The truth can hurt sometimes, but putting yourself in others shoes, makes you adaptable so can give you further insight.

Go to a time when you had a difference of opinion with someone. Visualise that person stood before you now, notice all the details.

Now step out of your body and let any emotions go. This will soon start to make sense.

Step into their body and notice the world from their perspective, seeing, hearing, feeling and thinking from their point of view.

Next, step away from their body and let their feelings go.

Think of someone you admire. A friend, hero, saint, even a character from a book or the past who is mature, intelligent and wise. Step into their body and see that person considering you and your foe from a neutral position.

Are there any insights you can find. What advice would this mentor give you?

Lastly, step back into your own body taking with you anything you have learned. Can you move toward a resolution? Do you see things different?

A key to reaching your potential is learn to listen to others. Take advantage of the experience of coaches and senior players. They have faced the challenges you face and know how to deal with them. Place your tongue on the roof of your mouth, this quietens internal dialogue, so you can pay attention to the other person. Don’t interrupt or finish other’s sentences. People will appreciate your listening skills. If someone interrupts while your speaking, politely ask them to wait until you have finished then you will listen while they speak.

Most footballers don’t get to play in the World Cup. Follow your goals and not the crowd. You may feel envious when your friends go to parties, often the parties are not that much anyway. You can make up for it later. Avoid people and distractions that can turn you away from your dreams. Sometimes you may have to let go of old friendships if a fire to succeed in soccer burns in you.

One of the best ways to improve is mix with successful, skilful people. Surround yourself with achievers who provide good teaching and will make you better. Find a few people, players, referees, sports journalists, sport teachers, anyone who understands the game. Be cheeky, write to them for advice. Let them know you want to pick their brains on how you can become successful. They become aware of you and understand you are serious. Be humble. Listen. As long as you are respectful, most people will enjoy the opportunity to help you. Other people can also see situations without the emotional baggage you may carry.


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